Skip to main content

Wedging Into Fashion

Sarah Nicole Prickett has said that wedges are the most feminist of all heels.

Probably. They're easy to walk in (generally) and give good height and lift, without the ball-bearing pain of stillettos. You always have a full foot on the ground, and they're generally too thick to slip into sidewalk cracks and sewer grates, so you're less likely to stumble into a face first meeting with the concrete.

Who's about to look like Frankenstein?
They're also a tricky design that can go very, very wrong very easily, and not all shoe manufactureers have been successful at pulling off this increasingly popular, and feminist heel.

Currently a popular way to give boots a little lift, I have seen as many people wear this well, as I have seen women channeling the old Frankenstein monster in both styling and walk.

You can always spot a crappy wedge boot when it looks like the wearer's feet have been encased in blocks. No shape or texture to the wedge, and no change in material between the shoe and the wedge create a block look that's not good on anyone.

They're not known for their footwear.
It's even worse when monotone, block wedge boots are paired with skinny jeans. It creates an imbalance that makes girls look like some kind of jacked up Playmobile person.

Let's not forget about the walk either. Wedges can be really freaking tall. When I can hit six feet tall and not teeter on the edge of falling into oblivion at the first crack in the sidewalk, those are some sturdy shoes. You can walk or run in wedges (although this is not recommended), but if you're going to do either one, for the love of all things holy, please walk like a regular person.

Nina Ricci does wedges right.
Heel to toe. Repeat on the other side. One foot in front of the other. Please don't walk like you are actually wearing cement blocks on your feet. It's called walking, not marching, and you look like an ass marching around unless you're in full military gear, at which point you're not wearing wedges. And if you are, we need to have a different discussion about footwear and what's appropriate.

So be careful with your wedges, don't buy shitty block-looking boots, and remember how to walk like a human who's still alive. And remember some of them are still razor thin and can send you tumbling from your stilted tower.

Happens to me more than I like to admit.