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Showing posts from May, 2010

Shoe Fashion Specialist

That's my new title. I'm going to get business cards made that say I'm a "Shoe Fashion Specialist."

If you're wondering what the hell that means, it means some clever reporter made up a title for me instead of calling me a blogger.

The article is on men's shoes, and I can only hope that people read it and take heart. Men's shoes don't have to be expensive in order for them not to look like a total ass.

Also, please take note that the certified image professional (this is actually what he does) and I agree on just about everything. The personal stylist (who also runs her own company dressing people) seems to be off the mark and said that it's OK to wear suits and sneakers. Please note that it is not OK, even when celebrities do it. Chances are they were hitting the bottle before leaving the house, and that's how they ended up in sneakers at an awards ceremony.

I wonder what kind of career path I can take from here.

Anyone need someone to…

Never a comeback

A few days ago I got a Facebook message from a horrified friend.

"The people on the radio said fanny packs are back. You really need to address this in your blog."

But I write about shoes...

So today we take a break from shoes, and go into the world of accessories. Bags really aren't that far from shoes anyway, and some people insist that their bags and shoes should always match, but I always figured those people only have like three pair of shoes, because really, who has that much room? 

I digress.

I'm not much of a TV or radio person, so I Googled it, and judging by dates, fanny packs (or belt bags as one site called them) are always on the verge of coming back.

2007, 2008, 2009, and yes, 2010 were all the year that the fanny pack was going to make a comeback. Really, who decides this? And who thought that this was a good idea in the first place?

If you really have that much stuff to carry, buy a purse, or a man bag, a messenger bag, a murse (man purse), but for t…

Guns on heels

I have to admit, that ever since Madonna rocked a pair of black Chanel peep toes with handgun heels to the premier of "Filth and Wisdom", I've been smitten with the idea of having my own pair. Activists railed against her for the shoes, saying they promote the use of handguns and blah, blah, blah...It's fashion people. Sometimes fashion is not making political statements. And I'm pretty sure that Karl Lagerfeld was focusing on the fact that they look good and are art in the form of a shoe, as opposed to having Chanel make a political statement on handguns or gun violence.

After spending months obsessing over these shoes, this weekend I found my own pair of handgun shoes. They're silver sandals with bullet belt style straps across the toe and ankle by Pleaser Shoes. The bullets made buckling them a problem, but the largest issue was by far the towering 7 1/2 inch heel (and accompanying platform). I spend my life in heels and this is a challenge even for me.

Y…

Happy Fluevog Day!

Really, I'm not making it up. It's International Fluevog Day and they're celebrating 40 years. Today all regular price shoes in store are 15% off and every 40th web order is free, and there's free shipping all weekend.

I might have to rock the Fluevogs on over to the store in Wicker Park and see what kind  of damage I can do.

Flipping, flopping and dating

Men's shoes are important. I realize that I haven't really talked about them a lot, but I don't have a lot of male readers, and if they want to read about their shoes they can start their own blog. Plus, I don't think most men realize how important shoes can be.

Last week my younger sister called me and we were chatting, and got around to talking about this guy she had recently gone out with. When I asked if she was interested she paused.

He's a goner.

When I asked why (because I'm nosy not because I feel bad for the guy) she let forth with the litany of regular excuses. "He's nice, but there just wasn't a connection, and blah, blah, blah...and I hate to sound shallow, but he wore flip flops."

Wait, what? Where? To a bar? On a date? With you?

Barf.

Now if this date was at a beach, or a park, or not the second date, maybe this would have been OK. Or if he was coming from the beach, or they were getting hot dogs (which she would never do because…

Mail order gold

Coming home to surprises is always fantastic. Like when someone unloads the dishwasher or takes out the trash.

That doesn't happen in my house, but I dream about it. Maybe it happens in someone else's house.

So while I had to load my own dishwasher and take out the garbage today, I did get shoes in the mail. I don't really have time to shop in a store like regular people, so I stalk things online. And when I saw gold metallic sandals I realized that I must own them. Who wouldn't need these? 4" stiletto gladiator sandals are a necessity in any wardrobe, and in mine they have to be gold.

I'm not entirely sure what they're going with yet, but I'm sure I'll find something. I'm also pretty sure that they're not going to be my most comfortable shoes, and if I've had a few cocktails I may end up just sleeping in them. The wrap around ankle straps make getting them on and off a little difficult.

At least I'll look good while sleeping.

White after when?

Last week I got a call from a friend, who was asking about the proper time of year to wear white shoes. She was confused by the rules, and instead of committing a shoe faux paux, decided to change her whole outfit and wear different shoes.

Having not seen the shoes, I can't judge their whiteness, but my mom's rule is you only wear white shoes (or pants if you're the daring type) between Easter and Labor Day. Her mom's rule was Memorial Day and Labor Day, which is even less time to rock the light colors. But in recent years the rules have become more relaxed. Cream and eggshells don't count as white, and a few years ago the fashion industry introduced "winter white" as a brazen "f-you" to the old rules.

Some people still have issue with the old rules and new rules. My Mom is convinced that red and pink don't match, but has to concede that my pink shoes with red suede flowers from Chinese Laundry are amazing. And I personally don't wear wh…

Killer heels

A friend recently posted a link on Facebook to a website called ifshoescouldkill.com. This is of course amazing, and I immediately had to look, and make mental notes of all the bizarre stuff on there, including the psuedo wearable.

Then I saw a pair of shoes I actually own. Really. Right there on the page were my Iron Fist Zombie Stompers.

Those are shoes that could kill?

I understand that they're zombie print and all, and they have teeth, but really? Compared to the other shoes on the site, they're kind of tame. And if it's about heel height, my Aldo Mary Jane stilettos are way higher. I've even fallen over in those shoes and wrecked myself (in the shoe's defense, I had been drinking).

If all it takes is a killer heel, and some kind of crazy print, I'm sure I have all sorts of crap that could land on this website.

Other shoes on the website aren't even shoes, they're art. And not really wearable art either. 

I wonder if Lady Gaga and I can be friends…