Saturday, May 25, 2013

Jane Pratt Should Let Me Write for Her

If you've ever paid any passing attention to magazines and publishing then you know the name Jane Pratt. She is the founding editor of Sassy, then Jane, and now

When I was younger and reading Sassy (because I am that old), I wanted to write for them. By the timeSassy had gone, Jane was hanging around, and I was more into Cosmopolitan, Vogue and finding a job than moving to New York to work for Jane Pratt.
I missed this issue...
I graduated college with my degree in communications with a concentration in print journalism,

My younger sister, who was a devout fan of Jane, now follows Now totally online, has more articles than the magazine, a bunch of writers, and a strong Twitter presence. My sister also loves sending me articles from there, and this week managed to send two of the dumbest damn columns about shoes I may have ever read.

Considering the drivel I sometimes turn out on shoes, that's saying something.

First, we have Nicole and "Why I won't wear high heels, ever again." Seriously? Ever? Because that's a long fucking time and maybe one day something may come up that makes you want to wear them. Or you have to because you're an adult female and that's one of the things we do sometimes.

I'll save you the pain of reading this piece of nonsense and sum it up with the fact that this Toms, orthotics wearing she-man who works from home hates heels because they hurt her once and her dad said that sensible shoes are better.

Super easy to only wear orthopedic boots when you don't have to put on pants to go to work.

I get it. She walks a lot and doesn't like heels, and that's fine. They're not for everyone, But she is such a nasty troll about other people's shoe decisions that it aggravating as hell.  She also can't write a conclusion and the article ends abruptly like a car crash.

She writes for Jane Pratt and didn't ever go to journalism school. I only assume this since she can't write. Maybe I'm wrong. Regardless, she can keep her "comfy shoes," long walks through Manhattan and granny panties (because she hates thongs). I'll stick with cute shoes, girly underthings and cabs.

Today I got another silly article from my sister, who is now convinced that I should be writing about shoes for This one from Brooke, who declares that she still wears stilettos even though she's a mom.

Guiseppe Zanotti heels that I will wear around children
Good for her, right? It's hard to chase kids in heels. And yoga pants are not acceptable for everyday wear. But she stresses how she dresses up like an adult, and looks nice, and brushes her hair, puts on lipstick and stuff even though she's a mom...

What the fuck people?

I know lots of moms who still use a brush and wear heels. When did it become OK to not do those things and now is this even vaguely noteworthy? I have a small niece and nephew, and step kids, and I wear heels all the time. And lipstick. I also have a full time (plus) job.

So you'd think this stay at home mom could find time to brush her hair without thinking she deserves a freaking award.

I need to find the submission guidelines for, because if this is the kind of drivel they find acceptable, I can totally help generate some copy for them. Maybe I can even offer up some real advice on shoes that doesn't involve never wearing heels ever or how to not turn into a troll-mom. An article from someone who actually leaves their house everyday may be just the thing xoJane needs.

Plus, my teenage self still wants to become best friends with Jane Pratt.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Kate Spade Goes Gilt

I have spent most of my life being rather adverse to preppy things. Never one to rock sweater sets and pearls (unless it was in an ironic way), my fashion has always been a little off center.  Because of that there have always been certain designers that I have shied away from.

I'm oddly obsessed with this bag. 
Recently though I find myself revisiting some of those who I had shrugged off , maybe it’s age, maybe it’s the designers that are getting less preppy, or maybe we’re meeting somewhere in the middle.

Kate Spade, always preppy in my view, has recently been releasing some really interesting looks, both in handbags, as well as clothing and jewelry, which is why I’m excited about the Kate Spade New York event on Gilt, which starts tomorrow (May 22).

Every four weeks Gilt members (and we’re all members, right?) will get first access to the new Kate Spade New York collection before it’s available anywhere else. Even better, a bunch of stuff will be discounted (because it’s Gilt) at up to 50% off.

Personally, I’m loving the gold bag, which reminds me of
Perfect for a summer wedding
(but I would have better shoes). 
something my grandmother used to have in her closet (and I mean that in the best way possible!). I’m also infatuated with the floral jacquard dress, which would be perfect for a wedding I have coming up. Obviously I love anything shiny.

I’m also holding my breath and hoping they add a couple pair of the Kate Spade Keds to the sale because my mom has been dying for a pair, and it would be such a fun surprise for her. (Hopefully she’s not reading this). There's also the classic flats, and I saw a pair of wedges in the preview sale that are pretty nice looking. 

For you bag junkies, there will be more bags, and there will of course be jewelry. I’ve already seen a couple baubles in the form of rings and bracelets, and I’m sure there will be more.

Set your alarms for 12:00 pm EST (lunchtime!) to start snatching up these deals. If you’re not yet a Gilt member (shame), you can join here for free. That means I just took away all your excuses. And if you are a member of Gilt, bookmark the sale at

Monday, May 20, 2013

Paint and Why I Can't Buy New Shoes

This is the same price as a really nice pair of shoes.

If you follow me on Facebook or Twitter then you know I’ve been busy. So busy in fact that I haven’t written a blog post in over a week. 
Lucky for my traffic, people are obsessed with Whoopi Goldberg’s shoes, and that post is still constantly being found via Google. Apparently last week was quite a week for Whoopi because people kept visiting me even though I haven't written shit. 
So where the fuck have I been that I feel like I can traipse in and out of all your lives, tromping on your heel-loving hearts with my stilettos?
Yeah, I guess I owe everyone an explanation, because this is going to get worse before it gets better, and I don’t want all you lovely people forgetting about me.
There’s work. I’ve been there a lot. And traveling. New York twice, D.C. next, I got sick two or three times, and I had some family stuff pop up. But most of my weekends have been spent working on my new house.
Apparently the hubby and I decided we wanted to test the limits of our sanity and our marriage, and bought a house that needed a crap-ton of fixing up (the living room was fluorescent green!), and suddenly it’s go time and we’re half moved into it, and half out of our apartment, and I have paint in my hair all the time, and I haven’t bought new shoes in months because I spent all my money on a new dining room set and paint.
Dear god, there is so much paint.
Just for the record, a five gallon bucket of Behr paint/primer in Princess Ivory successfully covered my living room and dining room, and cost as much as a pair of Stuart Weitzman heels.
I don't have the Tara pump by Miista
because of the damn house. 
When I pointed that out to dear husband he suggested I take an old pair of heels and dip them in the paint. 
I suggested he stick that idea up his ass. 
It’s a good thing that we built a new closet in the bedroom, because when we’re moved in and have a disposable income again (and am not disposing of it at Home Depot), I am going on a shopping spree that will make up for all these months of no shoes, accessories and clothes. Plus I need to replenish my wardrobe since so much went to the Salvation Army in the purge between closets.
Also, all that painting and climbing up and down ladders is a workout in itself, and if I keep going at this pace, when coupled with hauling boxes, I’m going to be skinnier, so I’ll need new clothes for that reason too. Then there’s also the part where I’m always sick and have no appetite.
But once we finally move in, I plan on shopping and drinking pretty much for like a month straight. You know, when I’m not working.

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Swarovski lends Sparkle to THE WALK

Blair Disbrow
On May 3 the runway in Chicago sparkled just a little more than normal when the School of the Art Institute of Chicago (SAIC) juniors, including Blair Disbrow, Jordan Kiehle and Crystale Crubaugh, presented their Swarovski embellished collections at THE WALK. 
THE WALK is the SAIC yearly fashion benefit gala, and this year featured over 250 fashions from undergraduate students, and fashions from the school's graduate students. 
Swarovski provided the jewelry and crystals for the show as part of the company's sponsorship of the event, which also included the window display at the Michigan Ave. store that I attended a few weeks prior. 
Crystale Crubaugh
“Swarovski is synonymous with fashion and our sponsorship of THE WALK allows us to work with the runways stars of tomorrow,” said Wayne Page, senior vice president of Swarovski North America. “SAIC produces some of the most talented emerging fashion designers, and it was remarkable to see how the jewelry and crystals came to life as part of the innovative window display and on the runway.”
Jordan Kiehle
Designers featured in the show will sell garments and accessories at a pop-up shop called Su_7 on Block 37 at 108 N. State in Chicago May 10-18. That means you can get your own piece of the budding designers before they become sought-after designers. 

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Met Gala Goes Punk - Kinda

Last night was the annual Met Gala, and all the celebs got all dressed up and showed their best "punk." Or at least that's what they were supposed to do anyway, because that was the theme of this year's gala.

She wins in so many ways.
It wasn't expected that the stars would actually be punk (because that would be too cool), but instead some kind of costumed, couture, combining the best parts of punk with the amazingness that only money can get you. 

The fact that only rich, famous people attend the Met Gala should really help with this. 

Unfortunately, rich and famous people apparently have no sense of adventure, costuming or what's punk, and the event was overwhelmingly safe, with lots of gowns and nonsense. A sheer panel or a spiked belt does not make an outfit punk. 

The hands down winner of the evening was Sarah Jessica Parker. She
Casadei heels and perfect punk in two different ways.
wore a Giles Deacon dress, Philip Tracey mohawk headpiece, and a pair of over the knee, plaid boots from Christian Louboutin. Sure gowns aren't really punk, but when you're going punk for the Met Ball, this is how you do it. 

Christina Ricci was also a total win for the evening in a plaid Vivienne Westwood. Because if you're going to go punk couture  do it in something from the women who put punk fashion on the map. She paired this fab dress with a pair of black pumps from Casadei. 

Also in Casadei heels and embracing punk more than anyone else at the gala, was Madonna. Wearing a fishnet bodysuit, plaid, chains, studs and no pants, she was more costume than ball gown, but it worked. Even with no pants. Unfortunately, her pink Casadei heels (while fabulous) didn't really match the outfit. 

Emma Watson. Boring and not punk,
but I love her Brian Atwood heels and the cutouts.
There were other stars who got the punk memo and didn't look like total disasters, and then there were ones who were really just boring as hell.  Some of my favorites from the evening are below.
Elizabeth Banks. This is really all about the shoes.

This is not my favorite, but I wanted to post
another pic of Kim looking like a couch.
Does she not own a mirror?

Beyonce in Givenchy with matching boots.
A bit much, and not punk, but the boots are great. 

Sunday, May 5, 2013

DSW Saves Prom

I don't always shop for myself. Sometimes I shop for other people, and a couple of weeks ago I placed an order with DSW for a pair of heels for prom.

Obviously not my prom.

Seychelles off-white Just Because pump, which is satin with a big white flower on the top. The perfect shoes to go with a full-length Calvin Klein dress with white/gold beaded straps. A great combination with large, rhinestone encrusted earrings and large mother of pearl cocktail ring.

The whole thing was topped off with upswept hair and a matching flower (with rhinestone center, of course).

I can accessorize the hell out of things.

The shoes that were sent to save prom. 
It took a couple of days to get the tracking information for the shoes, but I wasn't too worried. Prom was Friday, they showed they would be delivered Thursday. All was good with the world. The next day I checked the tracking information, and it was showing as Friday.

Now we're cutting it close.

The next day they showed as being delivered on Saturday. Too late to be of any use.

Being overwhelmed at work, and now faced at taking a half day to run out and try and find these shoes, I took to Twitter with a snarky comment for DSW and FedEx. Prom wasn't going to be ruined on my watch.

By the time I checked Twitter again, FedEx had contacted me to find out what they could do. I talked to Robin at FedEx, who started tracking the package for me and contacted the place that had it to see if they could move it along faster.

DSW asked me to email them with details. I did, and was expecting them to tell me that I placed the order too late, and they can't control shipping, and blah, blah, blah. But that is not what happened.

The shoes going back to DSW.
Instead DSW offered to overnight a new pair of heels so they would arrive on Friday before 3:00, giving time to make sure they were prom-ready. All at no charge.

I was floored. I was impressed with FedEx contacting me every time the package moved, but a whole new shipment?! That's stepping up.

Of course, I had to return the other pair of shoes when they finally arrived, but that's fine. What would I
do with two pair of duplicate heels not in my size anyway?

True to their word, the heels arrived before 3:00 on Friday, and were absolutely perfect. They tied the whole look together and are the perfect prom shoe.

The next day the heels from the original order showed up, and I opened them up, took the return slip out, repackaged and will be sending them back this week.

As for DSW and FedEx? They've both gained a faithful customer for life. As if DSW's membership points and prices weren't good enough, their customer service is unparalleled. And in my busy life, where everything happens on my phone or late at night when I'm done with my day job, that's worth more than you can imagine.