Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Guns on heels

I have to admit, that ever since Madonna rocked a pair of black Chanel peep toes with handgun heels to the premier of "Filth and Wisdom", I've been smitten with the idea of having my own pair. Activists railed against her for the shoes, saying they promote the use of handguns and blah, blah, blah...It's fashion people. Sometimes fashion is not making political statements. And I'm pretty sure that Karl Lagerfeld was focusing on the fact that they look good and are art in the form of a shoe, as opposed to having Chanel make a political statement on handguns or gun violence.

After spending months obsessing over these shoes, this weekend I found my own pair of handgun shoes. They're silver sandals with bullet belt style straps across the toe and ankle by Pleaser Shoes. The bullets made buckling them a problem, but the largest issue was by far the towering 7 1/2 inch heel (and accompanying platform). I spend my life in heels and this is a challenge even for me.

Yes, they're pretty much stripper platforms, and a friend added that they look like something a tranny would wear and followed that up with wanting to know why I didn't own them yet.

Sometimes I think I need new friends. 

But I digress, the reason I don't have them is simple; I can't walk. There's a difference between teetering around like an idiot (which I do a lot), and feeling like you're on stilts. These made me feel like I was on stilts. Me, plus 7 1/2 inches puts me at about six feet tall. I've never seen the world from up there, and after teetering around the store I can verify that it's pretty horrifying, and I think the air is thinner.

So now I mourn the lack of weapons in my shoe collection (barring the shoes themselves) and continue the search for something like Madonna's Chanel shoes with a little more pocketbook-friendly price tag.

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