Cat in Heels

Most women have a stash of shoes in various places. Drawers at the office, the trunk or backseat of the car, or all of the above. We have this because our needs are constantly changing. I walk almost a mile from the train to the office. I can’t do that in the heels I’ll wear all day. Plus all that walking can’t be good for the heels (or my feet in the heels).  Then there’s the after dinner drinks, lunch that you’re walking to but is still professional so you want heels, weekends and time chasing kids, or going out on the town. Never mind that we need shoes in different colors or styles, the main reason we hoard shoes in a million places is because one height doesn’t work for everything. You can’t walk a mile in stilettos twice a day for years, just like you can’t wear a low heeled oxford with a dress on a date night. This constant changing is how we end up with drawers full of shoes scattered throughout the various Heels with flames. Love this. places we live our lives like s...

When I was in my 20s (and early 30s) there were always places I could go where everyone knew me. And by everyone I mean the bartenders, bouncers and the cast of regulars. I had my Cheers . Sure it was a heavy metal/punk rock bar that always smelled of cigarettes (even after the smoking ban in Chicago) and drunk-person sweat, but that was my scene and I loved it.  Now we’ve all moved on (thank you for keeping me updated Facebook), and it’s a very different place where people don't know me, but they do know my daughters. DSW . I bet you thought I was going to say something like the playground or Gymboree, Carters, or some baby music class. No, it’s DSW. I have gone in there so many times with my infant daughters they recognize me. I am being asked how to style difficult shoes. I’m told about promotions that aren’t advertised yet and about new shoes that came out. (The boot section is bananas right now for fall). Not my store, but close. Still, while I’m the one with the c...

A new shoe collaboration has been unleashed, and you better act fast because it's only here for a little bit. Haydee Oxford Gilt.com and Glamour magazine teamed up to bring a new capsule collection, Gilt Hearts Glamour . The 9-piece collection is affordably priced from $79-$129, and has everything from pumps to flats and booties available in a variety of colors and textures. "We wanted to translate the key fall trends in a way that was both stylish and wearable," said Christina Perez, Glamour's fashion development editor. "We worked with a variety of shapes, materials and colors to ensure there was something chic for everyone-no matter their style personality. That was important to us since so many different types of women read Glamour. We felt the synergies between the Gilt customer and the Glamour reader made Fabiola platform pump Gilt and ideal partner for this project." Gail Snake Embossed pump Personally I love the snake embossed p...

Deadly perfection I need to start using my iPad more. I bet I can nurse babies and type on my iPad. (You’re welcome for that disturbing visual). I also need to not be sick, which I’m not anymore, so that’s a good start. And if both babies would sleep through the night, then I’d totally have it together and write on a way more regular basis. I haven’t had a full night’s sleep in over 5 months. Now that I’m done with my excuses, let’s talk Louboutin. Unless you’ve been living under a rock you know that the shoe genius released a line of nail polish, priced at the pretty penny of $50 a bottle. Despite being the most expensive nail lacquer I know of, it is also sold out everywhere. I attribute this to a few factors: The bottle is totally bad ass and made of crystal The bottle top can double as a weapon. You can stab someone and then finish your manicure. It’s like James Bond toys for women. Everyone wants to own something Louboutin and $50 is just the price point where we can all...

When I got pregnant everyone kept telling me how it was going to change my feet. How my feet would get bigger, or flatter, or both. Once in a while a little ray of light would come through and some woman would tell me that her feet didn’t change at all. Everything was the same as it always was and all her shoes fit even better than before she was pregnant. (Yeah, I made that last bit up). My new shoes need to be even bigger. I’ve decided the women who didn’t have any foot changes are either lying or were those horrid people who gain like 10 pounds and have that perfect, round, little bump that looks like the fake belly women wear in maternity catalogs. Being pregnant with twins I gained almost 50 pounds, my feet swelled, and my bump was more of a giant belly mound that expanded forward, up, down and sideways, threatening to crush me at every turn. Luckily, as soon as I gave birth I lost all but 5 pounds (muscle mass is a different story), my feet slowly stopped being all swol...

Gladiator sandals are still in style, and I am back to traveling for work. This means that I get to see all the fashion atrocities that people across the country (or world depending on the airport terminal) commit, including that of gladiator sandals. I am quickly coming to the conclusion that you should take a styling class before wearing them. Seriously...WTF? Last week I sat at Midway Airport in Chicago for an extra two hours while my flight was delayed because of the weather, previously delayed planes, or some kind of star alignment. (You never do know about those things).  In an effort to not think about the fact that I just walked away from my three month old babies for three days, I decided to instead focus on people watching (and talking in one unfortunate case when I got trapped listening to a lady tell me all about her delays and how her adult kids travel). The conclusion I came to while wandering around the airport (I was looking for a nursery or place to pump,...

For some reason I’m obsessed with peep toe booties, and yet, so picky about the way they look I didn’t own any. Finally I found a pair from Sophia & Lee that I did like. Black, peep toe with a sling-back (so they don’t look too blocky), lacing and a subtle texture to the shoe. They would look amazing with a pair of cropped cigarette pants, and give a little oomph to a fun summer dress (assuming I ever own such a thing). They were the first shoes I ordered after I gave birth to the twins and my feet were back to a normal size (although not my previous size). Then it turns out I didn’t leave the house for weeks on end because I had two newborns at home, so they basically sat in my room collecting dust. Then I went back to work. I love these shoes, but they suck, The first day I tried them on at work, I was so unstable I actually took them off and wore a different black shoe from my shoe drawer at the office. The heel didn’t look so high I couldn’t walk in it, but that was t...

Valentine's Day is fast approaching, and that means that you have to quick run out and buy all the red and pink and heart covered things you can and wear them all at once. Right? Or not because that's annoying as hell and Valentine's Day isn't really something worth getting uber Sophia Webster worked up about unless you're in a new relationship or you consider it a high holiday. Most years I don't celebrate at all, but Husband and I opted to make dinner reservations this year simply because with the babies on the way we're probably never having a meal out again. I will not be getting a special dress or shoes for the occasion due to my current size, but if you're going to be celebrating, there are some amazing Valentine's inspired options out there that are sure to look amazing and make your honey swoon. If you don't have a honey, then you can still buy some amazing shoes just because you're awesome and every woman deserves shoes. S...

Boss Jezebel wrote a whiny, shitty post today about artist Sebastian Errazuriz and a new exhibit he has at Art Basel where he showcases shoes dedicated to exes. Sebastian has a Tumbler called 12 Shoes for 12 Lovers . Each shoe, posted on a different day, showcases a different ex and has a different story. The ice queen, the boss, the rock... each one unique and reflecting a piece of the artists life with each woman. I think it's a brilliant collection of art. Jezebel thinks it's silly because he talks about sex and whines. If that's the case then almost all art is whiny garbage. Art comes in many forms, and I love the idea of telling stories through shoes. How is that any different than a painting, sculpture or music? The world would have almost no music if we discounted things about exes.   The accompanying narratives take away the guess work and artistic interpretation, but it goes far to tell a story. What Jezebel fails to understand (aside from the ba...

If you've ever paid any passing attention to magazines and publishing then you know the name Jane Pratt. She is the founding editor of Sassy , then Jane , and now xoJane.com . When I was younger and reading Sassy (because I am that old), I wanted to write for them. By the time Sassy had gone, Jane was hanging around, and I was more into Cosmopolitan, Vogue  and finding a job than moving to New York to work for Jane Pratt. I missed this issue... I graduated college with my degree in communications with a concentration in print journalism, My younger sister, who was a devout fan of Jane, now follows xoJane.com . Now totally online, xoJane.com has more articles than the magazine, a bunch of writers, and a strong Twitter presence. My sister also loves sending me articles from there, and this week managed to send two of the dumbest damn columns about shoes I may have ever read. Considering the drivel I sometimes turn out on shoes, that's saying something. First, w...

Generally I am not a magazine person. I used to be, but that's when I was in high school and the Internet was all slow and dial up, and it took 20 minutes to load a page. Somehow I ended up on a mailing list for a couple magazines though. One about destination weddings (which I didn't have), one fitness magazine (I us it as a coaster for my vodka) and one fashion magazine. Believe it or not, I actually read the fitness and the fashion magazine, as if I'll somehow get prettier and have better abs through osmosis. Of course, then I run into an article that reminds me why I don't read fashion magazines. An article on the secret messages your outfit is sending men, sent me into a tizzy this weekend. Mostly because I don't give a shit what message my outfit sends (I dress for me, not some dude) and the advice therein was beyond stupid. Among the brilliant tidbits: Logos on your clothes mean you shop a lot (I always thought it meant you're totally uninspire...

The human obsession with shoes dates back to the first time some cave man strapped pieces of dead animal to his foot and tied it on, forever changing the human foot. Sure, the first shoes probably weren't very pretty, but neither are gym shoes and people wear the heck out of those.  I came across a link to a National Geographic article called " The Joy of Shoes " that DNA Footwear linked to. This amazing article chronicles the history of a few different kinds of shoes, interviews the master of shoes, Manolo Blahnik , and shows that shoes really can be a window into the soul (sole?) of humanity.  A chopine required having servants help you walk. Shoes are everything. From identifying social status to bronzed baby shoes of the deceased and the war that brought us floor ruining stilettos, shoes define us and can define a generation or culture. No wonder women are so obsessed with them. Not only are shoes wearable art, they are wearable history. You are actual...

Sometimes the best thing about writing a blog is being able to look at the web analytics. It's kind of like spying on your readers. I can tell what country traffic is coming from outside my native U.S. (love you South Africa), how long people spend reading (average 5 minutes), the most popular posts , and my personal favorite, the search terms that get me found. These are the first shoes that show up. Gag.  Sure, there are the regular ones like designer names, "high heels," "leopard print heels," and so on. This week brought me the new weird one though. "Heels made of cat." "Bullshit, that doesn't work," I'm thinking. Not to mention the wondering of why anyone would ever look for heels made from cats, or any kind of shoe for that matter. So I go to Google, and search, and sure enough, there it is. Right underneath some ugly wooden shoe with "CAT" in the style name, a story on cat surgery, and some defunct brand o...

The other day I got a text from my brother-in-law. It said Vibram FiveFingers and then a link. Now, maybe there's something wrong with me, but my immediate thought was, "Why am I getting porn SPAM from the BIL?" Then I realized that texts aren't SPAM, and there's no way he'd send me porn (because that's weird) and it had to be something else. So I took a deep breath and clicked on the link. I'm pretty sure I would have rather seen porn. Instead there are pictures of people's feet adorned in those awful hobbit feet, rubber shoe things. Which I guess are kind of like porn because they're obscene looking, and kind of like a foot condom. I must have taken a while because then he sent a text, "Cat in fingers?" Ummm...no. I understand it's the closest thing to being barefoot, and that's good, and it's anatomically correct, and designer shoes are still more expensive and definitely not as comfy, but the fact remains th...

When my mom finds a sweater she likes, she then buys it in multiple colors. I never understood it. Then I saw this amazing pair of leopard shoes and found myself wondering, how many pairs of leopard shoes is too many? I think it's a family trait. I currently have two pair of leopard shoes. One is a pair of Mary Jane style wedges I hate and never wear. They will soon be in a garage sale. Another is a fabulous pair of Steve Madden with a wooden platform and heel and they're made of pony hair! How could those be any cooler? How about if they have a giant red ruffle on them? These shoes are so me that I had three people email me photos of them, and I tried to convince a friend to buy them so I can borrow them. She did not bite, and I was really having a hard time justifying this purchase. So then my thought was that I should find the same shoe with a peep toe, and then it's a totally different look. But then, these aren't horse hair, so it's really not the same...